Christmas Letter


Where to begin? I suppose I should start with an exhaustive list of excuses explaining my absence from the blogosphere recently. Basically it boils down to one excuse. I've been busy trying to find a job. Apparently, everybody in the food service industry feels I'm overqualified to serve their patrons a delicious meal, quickly. I kid, of course, but Shaleah and I have had some difficulty deciding where live and work next year.

Still, I promised to write a Christmas letter this year and being the fan of entropy that I am the least energy state I could conjure was a Christmas letter disguised as a blog haiku form.

No Christmas lights here
The neighbors are all confused
I'm just too lazy

The war on Christmas
Created by cable news
Kudos Hannity

Married in July
Hot as hell in Seattle
Air conditioning

Shaleah tells me
"Let's work less for less money"
Goodbye new ipod

Two dogs is too much
Lucy ate Harry Potter
It was delicious

My wife a pilot?
Shaleah learning ground school
No crashes so far

Jeffrey a lawyer?
Many jokes so little time
Ambulance chaser

Not all blogs equal
Everyone reads Kat Fancy
Fashion trumps "The Suns"

Planning vacation
Could we bike in New Zealand?
Watch out for Hobbits

Graduation soon
Twenty-eight years no real job
Life a harsh mistress

Next year Hanukkah
Celebrated in free verse
Because I hate you