Why do deaf people hate plants?

It was an interesting weekend on call. To wit, on Saturday night (nee Sunday morning) a very intoxicated person with a very intoxicated deaf friend came to the emergency department.

While the drunk patient turned out to be perfectly fine her intoxicated hearing impaired friend seemed to be competing for most emotionally distraught drunk acquaintence. In addition to literal wailing and gnashing of teeth at one point I returned to the nurses station to find the deaf friend removing the potting soil from a nearby bamboo plant and flinging it around the nurses station like a drunk, deaf, hysterical, sad Rip Taylor.

If you are already down to 5 senses don't impair the others with C₂H₆O.