Today you have been gestating for 20 weeks. Where does the time go? It seems like just yesterday you were a fetal pole. Anyway, I digress.
You’re halfway to 40 weeks, but I would be thrilled if you would just stay put until 36 or 37 weeks. No use rushing out the door. And not that you would take my advice, but don’t give your mother so much grief.
Ha, very astute. I do sound like a Jewish grandmother, but your vicious verbal barbs do not phase me. Now, eat something! You’re skin and bones!
This was a big week for your uncle Jeffrey. He started his new job at Wernham-Hogg. Don’t worry, you’ll get that joke later when I force you both to watch The Office. Actually, he is working for a law firm in Prescott, AZ. They specialize in real estate law. He even has his own business cards. What…? Oh, they’re like small pieces of card stock that you put your name and contact information on so you can give them to people who need to contact you. No, it’s like thick sturdy paper. What? Yes, well it’s something you write on that is made from wood pulp…I’ll explain trees later. Anyway, you’ll hear some things about lawyers later, but don’t worry, your uncle is a good one. What’s that? Ha ha, no he’s not dead. How is it that you know all these lawyer jokes but you don’t know what trees are? Nevermind…
Your cousins Ada and Anchor are also doing well. We saw them both this week via the wonder of the internet! That? It’s just a voice I use when I want to be dramatic. No, it’s not Paul Lynde, it’s more like Ian McKellan. Yes, they are, but one has a much more impressive voice. Well, I disagree! Fine, I’ll stop.
I often wonder what it would be like to grow up being able to see your cousin at anytime via the wonders of video chat? In my day if we wanted to see our cousins we had to drive 14 hours to another part of the United States. No, not through the snow! Well if it wasn’t for us you wouldn’t even have holographic chatrooms. Yes, I wrote this on a computer. No, I don’t have the punch-cards to prove it. Stop snickering.
Your uncle Elliott is still in Afghanistan flying Predator drones. Oh, so you know what those are…excuse me for assuming. You will be going to his wedding, but you’ll be 26 weeks then. Oh, right, I forgot you can’t see. Yes, of course I’ll take plenty of pictures.
Last, but not least this week your mother took you flying, twice, in the Cessna 152. I’m sure you enjoyed it.