kgautreaux/blog

An ocean of noise

At least the dogs are getting smarter.

I'm too stupid to be able to build a regular mailbox post so at the risk of hours of mocking by my wife I purchased a pre-cut and drilled PVC mailbox post assembly kit. Even this was taxing to my limited DIY skills but after hours of work it is finally complete.




In keeping with my theme of angering Shaleah by paying for overpriced, premade items we received our new entertainment center. Sleek, low to the ground, with a drag coeficient of nearly 0.1, this modern marvel only required that we screw on the legs and the door handles. It even came with its own screwdriver. The only drawback I could see with this particular model was it cost eight times as much as the television that now sits on it, has its own event horizon, and I had to devise an elaborate pulley and incline system not unlike that used by ancient Egyptians to build the pyramids, just to get it into our living room.


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So being the intelligent, decisive, fearless keeper's of your medical destiny that we are for our next purchase we decided to swing the pendulum in the polar opposite direction and buy an inexpensive, self-assembled, foyer residing bench seat with storage. Luckily we paid for it in tiny, tiny monopoly dollars.


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Do not adjust your monitors. Despite what you may have seen in this picture I am not actually thirty feet tall. The bench, it seems, would not be out of place in Bag End. I think I saw Bilbo inscribed on the bottom. Of course, given its size he had to leave off the O. Zing!


In the last crushing blow to my intellectual ego this week, our pea brained dogs outsmarted our $5,000 fencing system by hurling their collected masses against our fence until one of the slats popped free and they spent the morning gallivanting the neighborhood unbeknownst to us. Here, witnesseth the aftermath.